What are Family Constellations?
Family Constellations are a remarkable way of connecting with the truth of challenges that we face that bring deep healing and transformation.
One of the ways in which family constellations support is by enabling us to identify if any of the life challenges we face might be because we have inherited trauma or challenging patterns from our ancestors.
Family Constellations give us an insight into what our ancestors were going through, with trauma patterns that may have become stuck, that we can bring movement to (“unstick”, as it were), freeing us from those inherited patterns.
Where did Family Constellations come from?
Bert Hellinger (1925 - 2019) was a psychotherapist from Germany. The Nazi party failed to recruit him as a youth, and he was classed as 'Suspected of Being an Enemy of the People'. He studied Philosophy and Theology, and became a priest, and then travelled to South Africa in the early 1950s as a missionary, and lived with the Zulu people for decades.
Whilst Bert never stated that Family Constellations were a reflection of the wisdom he discovered with which the Zulu people explore and shift challenges, Family Constellations are a reflection of how indigenous tribes around the world address challenges, found in Taosim, Native American practices, and in tribes from across Africa, amongst many other peoples.
All indigenous peoples of the world understand that we are all part of a system; a collective in which each person belongs and has an important part to play. All indigenous peoples of the world honour and celebrate the important role our ancestors play in our lives.
An Issue Holder at a workshop will also experience being both a representative and a witness at some point in the day.
b) Representatives
Representatives are those invited by the Issue Holder to represent key family members, and the issue holder, and maybe even key elements (such as life, thriving, money, health, an illness, a system like the school or Court system, or a country a community). Being a representative is always in invitation - those invited can always decline if they would prefer not to represent. It can be a huge honour to represent. When representing, we connect with what it feels like to be that person or element, and it can be quite a visceral, and profound experience.
We might represent an ancestor who experienced great loss never resolved a deep grief, or had an illness, or was caught in a war, for example. We might represent someone who wasn’t perhaps in their lifetime very nice, but in representing them, we get an insight into why they behaved the way that they did, so healing, peace, compassion can come in - and the stuck trauma can move and no longer remain trapped. There is an opportunity to release what has become stuck in the field of the family. Movement for ancestors’ stuck traumas help us have movement in our lives if we have inherited their traumas.
It’s one of the remarkable aspects of family constellation work that often, when representing, we find ourselves representing something in someone else’s constellation that is actually relevant for us to see in relation to our own ancestors! Being part of someone else’s constellation can often be healing for you too.
Representing is always voluntary, and only ever an invitation for those who wish to take part.
Those who come as representatives will sometimes be witnesses too.
c) Witnesses
Witness are those who remain seated in the circle in the room. This is also an important role - witnesses are helping to anchor in the energy of The Field. They also can reflect something that might be difficult to initially identify in a constellation.
Like with representing, someone else’s constellation may have relevance for you and may bring you insights and healing too.
Can Family Constellations be done 1-2-1?
Yes, they can. My love of family constellations is in seeing the power of what it can do in group settings, using a collective energy, which is why I only use group work for Family Constellations. My 1-2-1 work focuses on homeopathy and the Blueprint Essences.
How many sessions are needed?
This question doesn’t have a set answer. Some people bring one issue and experience resolution. Where there is a lot of trauma, several constellations may be needed. Also, it’s a way of healing life’s challenges or discovering more about ourselves and our ancestors which means that we choose to constellate or represent in family constellations regularly, in the way others might have therapy or a massage regularly. For some people having both individual therapy and doing constellations can be remarkably powerful as they sit alongside each other beautifully.
How do Family Constellations work?
In essence, a group gather together, and hold a space for us to see what needs to be understood, shifted, and seen in order for something that is stuck to be able to move. We look at what is happening in “The Field” - the energy of the system - in this case, the family system. Family Constellations show the truth of a situation, which can bring a deeper understanding or a shift in perspective sometimes and with that healing.
There are different roles that people take in a workshop:
a) Issue Holder
This is the person who would like to present a challenge, or a question, or find out more about their family system and dynamics. The facilitator will begin by asking the Issue Holder why they have come, what outcome they would like, and to briefly share some key aspects of the challenges they might be facing.
Another Self Series on Netflix
There is a beautiful series on Netflix Another Self which follows a friendship group to see how the challenges each character faces could be a repeating pattern from something that happened to an ancestor. Each episode shows a different constellation, and is wonderfully depicted. The series was made in Turkey, so would need to be watched with subtitles if you don’t speak Turkish, and is so worth seeing. Series 2 and Series 3 have been confirmed too.